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Due to my failing 30 year old memory, I may not have remembered events or people involved correctly unless I had the help of photos. If you read this and you can actually remember who was there, what grade it was, or you weren't there, please tell me. I'll change it!
My parents are the coolest. Every year I could choose pretty much anything I wanted to do for my birthday and they would make it happen. Having an early April birthday, the fortune of my big day falling during Spring Break was a special treat, half the time. Being a girl, these parties were sleepovers 100% of the time.
(
Sidenote: Parents of girls who have sleepovers should receive medals.)
Throughout my childhood and teen years, there are four particular parties that stand out in my mind.
Psycho
Earlier in the school year, my best friend Jasmine's mom had introduced us to the black and white Hitchcock classic, Psycho. Neither of us were especially fond of scary movies (and still aren't), but the fact that the blood is black, no violence is shown, and it's from 1960 tones it down several notches. (That's not to say I didn't have an issue with showering for weeks... Or that the image of Norman Bates in the last scene, staring sociopathically into the camera while he thinks, "
I wouldn't hurt a fly", isn't burned into my brain for life.)
Frightening, no?
I decided that watching the same movie at my 11th birthday slumber party (1993) would be just perfect. After strategically arranging our sleeping bags in the TV room -- birthday girl in the middle, of course -- and popcorn being made, Jasmine, Anita, Tawnya, Sarah, Lauren, Joni, and I all settled in for a good spook.
Anyone who has seen Psycho knows that very early in the movie, there is a driving scene in which it begins to rain. Very early. Like, probably in the first 15 minutes.
As the six of us stared at the screen, enraptured by the black and white images, terrible background effects, and already terrifying soundtrack, another sound caught our attention. Future discussions about this party would reveal that there were several theories as to what we were hearing. I thought the movie had just gotten louder, and we were somehow hearing the rain pouring down in the Eaton Family's nonexistent Surround Sound. One girl thought a loud truck was driving by, and another thought a human being was actually trying to pound the windows in so he could murder us all.
It started as a faint drumming sound. As it grew louder and more intense, we all realized it wasn't part of the movie and that now was probably a good time to panic. It had become a very distinct
pounding on the windows right behind the TV, and was only getting louder. Horrified, some of us were paralyzed with fear, unable to move from the "safety" of our blankets. Sarah bolted out of the room (a very effective fight or flight response, good for her) and ended up locking herself in the guest bathroom, while Joni actually had the balls to stomp over to the locked front door, OPEN IT, and yell, "
Who's out there!?" (I don't recommend this
. Norman Bates himself could have been waiting on the front stoop, ready to snatch Joni and replace his dead mother with her.)
You know who was there? My dad. With a hose.
For the rest of the night, not a one of us would have the guts to go to the bathroom without a partner.
Tea Party
My mom is classy. As far back as I can remember she has always been an excellent cook and baker, as well as a talented quilter and seamstress. She can craft just about anything, appreciates the theater, and enjoys hosting fancy tea parties and luncheons for her friends. She's basically Martha Stewart without the convictions or prison time.
I am realizing every day how much like my mom I have become, and while I thoroughly enjoy some of these things now (I haven't jumped on the sewing train quite yet, but I'm sure I'll get there), as a kid I wasn't all that interested.
It was my mom's idea to have a tea party and see a play for my 12th birthday party. I invited three friends, Jasmine, Lauren, and Shauna. (If you've read my story about Shauna, you may wonder why she was invited to this party... well, I wonder the same thing. Middle school girls are mysterious creatures.)
My mom made us tea, along with other tea party necessities like cucumber sandwiches and fancy cookies.
We then made the drive down to Santa Maria to watch the PCPA Theater put on an entertaining stage production.
Two reasons this birthday party is so memorable to me:
1. I had been nervous about inviting my middle school friends to a tea party, and wasn't so sure I'd enjoy it myself. All of us were served delicious food and entertained, so there was nothing to complain about. We were quite sophisticated.
2. It was Easter time. It was 1994. So we wore these dresses:
Frightening, no?
Murder Mystery
My group of friends and I went through a "boxed murder mystery" party phase that lasted years. I can't remember who started it, but once we knew about the games, we couldn't stay away from them. Ever intrigued by a quality
who-dunnit, and being females who took any opportunity to dress up like someone else, these games were the perfect solution to the 'tween years'
what-should-I-do-for-my-party? problem.
One of the funniest parts about these game-oriented parties was that it required up to ten or twelve people to portray the characters involved. At least for me, this meant inviting way more people than I normally would to a birthday party. While I was friendly with most girls from my class throughout childhood, I always had (and still have) a very small group of close friends. I preferred a small group of true, trusted pals than a huge group of people who didn't know each other all that well. (This has served me well considering I'm still very close to my best friends from elementary school!)
I am almost positive that the title of the game we played for my 13th birthday (1995) was The Grapes of Frath. It had to do with a murder among the grapevines of some winery. (I believe this was an adult version of the murder mystery phenomenon that my parents had lying around. At the time there were Jr. versions that probably didn't involve stories centered on alcohol, but how fun would that be?) Maybe. We hardly had the attention span to
play the game when we were living it (many of the parties ended with us confused and bored, or never actually finding out who the murderer was), so I can't really remember the storyline 17 years later...
(
Sidenote: Lauren threw one of these parties last year for her 30th birthday called Murder in Margaritaville, for old time's sake. It's amazing what an adult attention span can do for these games.)
The most memorable character in my mind was the opera singer, who my friend Anita portrayed. We'd borrowed a viking hat from our Slavic math teacher, Mr. Indvik, so she would be as authentic looking as possible.
At the last minute, one of my girlfriends had to back out of attending my party, which left a character open. Having each player/character present was crucial for these games, or else evidence and clues might be left out when trying to solve the murder.
Remember how awesome my parents are? My dad disappeared for awhile early in the evening, only to emerge and surprise us all as the understudy for my missing friend:
Frightening, no?
Surprise Gorilla
My sixteenth birthday (1998) happened to fall during the same week as Templeton High School's Sadie Hawkins dance. The tradition was for the girls to ask the boys, and then dress like twins. This was the year I had met Jordan on the winter camp bus (see A Short List of the Boys I Have Loved), and we were still talking, so I invited him. Our breathtakingly creative twin outfits? Jeans, white t-shirts, and UCSB sweatshirts (thanks, Uncle John!).
My family planned to take me out to dinner before meeting a group of dance-goers at our house. We went to Lolo's, a popular Mexican food place. On the way home, I can remember getting annoyed at either my brother, or one/both of my parents. I probably thought we were going to be late and that people were already waiting for us at the house.
I pulled our light blue Mercury Villager into the driveway as speedily as I could without making my mom whiteknuckle the armrest (of course I was driving -- I had my permit, and was two days away from getting my license), jumped out, slammed the door, and huffily stomped up the walkway to our front door. I was probably muttering some disrespectful expletives in the masterful teenage girl way, as I unlocked the door, pushed it open, and was greeted with a chorus of "
SURPRISE!!!"
Frightening, no?
My first, and only, to date, surprise party was thrown by my family and a large group of friends, most of which were matching their respective dates to the Sadie Hawkins dance. I had not suspected a thing (hence my increasingly bad attitude with each stomp up to the front door). But the biggest surprise would come a bit later, when the doorbell rang, and a
full sized gorilla entered the house with a balloon, waiting to sing me Happy Birthday. I couldn't believe it.
Katie, Tawnya, Jasmine, me, Jamie, Derick, Jordan, Jen, Steve, Gorilla
Lauren, Amy, Ryan
Alec, Anita, Tarah, Nick, Brad
I'll always remember how awesome my birthday parties were growing up. My parents made a point of making my brother and me feel special and loved on our big days. My psycho, cross-dressing, tea partying, gorilla infested memories are treasured ones. Even if they are a bit frightening.
